A few of my own awards for tonight's Oscars show:
Query: Has the world come to an end now that Ludacris has been in two Oscar-winning movies?
WTF, Pt. 1: WTF is Keira Knightley doing sitting next to JACK NICHOLSON?!
Frustration: No more montages!!!
That being said, best montage moment: "Judi Dench took my eye out in a bar fight."
WTF, Pt. 2: Has Dolly Parton had ribs removed?!?!
Censors In Full Force: Referring to Terrence Howard's character in "Hustle & Flow" as a "dreamer" twice in the preshow broadcast.
Ouch: "Just for those of you keeping track of these things: Martin Scorsese, zero Oscars. Three 6 Mafia, one Oscar."
Dirty Comment: After seeing Ben Stiller in his unitard, Jon Stewart says "Nice to see he's Jewish."
EWWWW: J.Lo, LAY OFF THE BRONZER.
WTF, Pt. 3: What is Jessica Alba doing up there? Has she ever in any way been connected with an Oscar movie?!
Joke: "Bjork couldn't be here tonight. She was trying on her dress, and Dick Cheney shot her."
High Point: Three 6 Mafia -- EVERYTHING about their time onscreen. Particularly fond of the pimps and hos dancing. Think that's the first time the Academy has seen metallic go-go short shorts on stage?
Oscars are over and now I'm wondering...: Why wasn't Sin City nominated for an Oscar????? In anything!??!?
Wow: Crash a.k.a. 2006's Shakespeare in Love.